


Pity Party

by Excaliburstark



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Endgame Merthur, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Jealous Arthur, Jealous Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), M/M, Mild Angst, One Night Stand, Pining, Pity, Self-Pity, Sympathy, Unrequited Love, and deserves more attention, but its brief, but its still all third person, but then arthurs, cause that boys a cutie, endgame perwaine, ish, kind of Gwaine's pov, merlin being seen as desirable, no but really there is some major pining going on in this, not much dialogue, referenced merwaine, wow this is a lot of tags sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2019-06-01
Packaged: 2020-04-06 06:40:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19057267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Excaliburstark/pseuds/Excaliburstark
Summary: Gwaine's self pitying reaches new extremes, after Merlin finds his happy ending with Arthur, Arthur tries to ease Gwaine's misery.Surprisingly fluffy despite the tags. Enjoy! X(I might edit this and change it to merwaine? Idk)





	Pity Party

That bright star of a boy, some days Gwaine worried he'd burn out - too bright, too fast in the name of his king. Gwaine did like Arthur, and he saw why Merlin was so smitten: Arthur was handsome, brave, caring about his people and so on and so on but he was also not Gwaine, much to Gwaine's disappointment. 

His mind often drifted back to that one blissful night. Merlin writhering underneath him, all pale skin and luscious sounds. Gwaine tried hard to forget, drink drowning out the memory.

He stood now, watching as the other knights sparred and Arthur's glance flittered back to Merlin every few seconds. He wondered if Arthur even realised he was doing it, if he realised he even had a crush on Merlin. 

He sighed, those two needed to get their act together. He knew Merlin was emotionally unavailable when they'd slept together but at the time Gwaine had told himself that it was fine, that of course things could remain unchanged, that it wouldn't matter.

It did matter and things did change but it seemed to have gone unnoticed by Merlin. Gwaine pined, he hated to admit it but its what he was doing. He did it with far less grace than Merlin did. 

He was resentful at his feelings, he didn't want to embrace them for fear of sinking deeper. Merlin watched Arthur like he hung the moon and the very sight of it made Gwaine's heart curl, made him want to grab a drink and smash it into Arthur's stupid kingly face. 

Gwaine knew it was no good to think or feel these things. Arthur hissed as Leon accidentally nicked the unprotected skin in between Arthur's neck and shoulder. Merlin rushed over, hands clutching at his neckerchief that was had been untied so he could tend to Arthur immediately. 

He dragged Arthur off to the side and fussed over him, dabbing his wound. Leon apologised profusely, Arthur forgave him and said it was just a fluke. 

Arthur pushed lightly at Merlin, overwhelmed by his closeness. Gwaine snorted, what he wouldn't give for Merlin to fuss over him like that. Merlin was too worried to acknowledge the subtle rejection, too caught up in Arthur's welfare. 

His teeth chewed, grating against his lower lip and Gwaine watched aptly before shaking himself and walking away to find a spar partner. Leon dodged him, seeing the glittering expression in Gwaine's eyes. He knew from experience that frustration and hurt made Gwaine ruthless. 

He went to the tavern that night, as he had every night since but he drank more this time and decided to charge it to the Crown. If Arthur was going to throw away something precious, Gwaine was going to make him pay for it by covering his drinks bill. 

Arthur had been fuming the next day, Gwaine had felt guilt but only at Merlin's expression. It was clear who had suffered the brunt of the kings wrath although that didn't stop Gwaine from getting an earful.

Merlin had shuffled quietly in the background, his dull doleful eyes never leaving the floor as Arthur shouted at Gwaine till he was red in the face.

"- even listening to me!" Gwaine's head snapped up, his anger boiling, brimming till it overflowed. 

"You throw away things you don't even realise you have, I think I'm allowed to do the same. Sure it was your money but you have plenty." He spat, he could feel a set of blue eyes gaze at him regretfully, while the blue flame of the other pair staring at him fizzled out as confusion took its place. 

"What do you-" Gwaine shook his head, stopping Arthur's sentence. He didn't want to explain and he didn't have the energy. 

"Just give me a punishment already, I have somewhere I need to be." He muttered. 

Arthur huffed. "Fine. You and Merlin are to clean all of the knights shoes. I want them polished, every single pair."

Merlin made an indignant sound but kept his complaints to himself for once. Gwaine should've known that any of his attempts would've backfired, of course Merlin would get caught in the crossfire of Arthur's race. 

Gwaine didn't need to hear a verbal dismissal, Arthur's looming angry aura was enough to make anyone scarper. He was racing down the corridor when a hand grabbed his forearm, slowing him to a stop. 

Gwaine turned around with a sigh, looking straight into ocean eyes. He kept his gaze up, refusing to let it drop down to Merlin's mouth. He could still feel his kisses, the ghost of an old mistake that still hurt.

Merlin's hand was still pressed into his arm. He could feel it like a lead weight. Gwaine shook him off, he turned his back to him. "I'm fine Merlin, I'll see you later." 

Glancing over his shoulder as he fled, he saw how torn Merlin looked. He seemed unsure whether to go after Gwaine or return to Arthur's foul temper. Gwaine tried so hard not to laugh bitterly when Merlin chose Arthur, door shutting behind him as he re-entered the room.

Despite the hurt at being rejected, Gwaine couldn't help but enjoy his evening as he'd spent it with Merlin even if it had been cleaning stinky boots. The charisma Merlin possessed, whether he was completing chores or brewing potions was infectious.

Gwaine admired him for his constant glowing positivity. He remembered how annoyed with himself he'd been afterwards, irritated at falling right back into his old pattern of forgiving then being consumed by sorrow and resentment.

He could never stay mad at Merlin for long and whatever he felt it wasn't love but it was something close. It was strong enough that Gwaine ended up in the tavern nearly every night, although that was more due to Arthur than it was Merlin. 

It had been weeks since the shoe polishing incident, Merlin had been happier than Gwaine had ever seen him. Arthur was also surprisingly cheery considering how disastrous the day had been so far. 

He watched like a hawk at the warm looks the two shared, the lingering hands as the amount of affectionate touches increased. The way they startled and pulled away if they noticed anyone looking.

The ache in his chest tightened like a screw, he breathed deep in an attempt to relieve the horrible pressure building there. Merlin's sunny smile shone, Gwaine had once looked at it and hadn't cared of the risk of being blinded but now he covered his eyes. That light would never be his, so why speculate. Why burn himself

But he did anyway, he forced himself to watch as Merlin and Arthur pushed each other jokingly before collapsing back into each other. They'd soon pull apart, hands lifting from shoulders, distance growing, if a knight glanced at them twice or if sudden consciousness at an audience kicked in. 

It had been during a patrol that Arthur discovered what had transpired between Merlin and Gwaine. 

They'd been sat around the fire, Merlin grinning as the knights joked. Arthur had left to go over the plan once more time, pouring over the maps that were laid out in his tent. He'd come out at the sound of Gwaine's raucous laugh and Elyan's teasing tone.

Arthur watched from his tent, unnoticed as he dwelled there listening.

"So, what's happening with you and Arthur?" Lancelot asked, gently touching their shoulders together to get the manservants attention. 

Merlin's eyes widened before his mouth thinned to a line, as his gaze flickered to Gwaine who had fallen silent. Lancelot's forehead crinkeled before remembrance smoothed it. 

"Oh, I'm sorry Gwaine. I forgot, I-" Gwaine waited a moment as the knight stumbled for words. He clapped him on the back and told him it was fine but he avoided Merlin's gaze and the group felt unsettled by the strange hum of energy that had entered into their small circle. 

Merlin coughed trying to expel it, bringing up another subject. The odd vibe had piqued Arthur's interest. He ducked out of the tent and joined them. 

"What were you all talking about?" Arthur questioned as he settled besides Merlin. Merlin turned towards him and gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head, Lancelot's stare made Arthur feel guilty at his tactless curiosity but he continued never the less. 

"Well?" He prompted as the silence continued. 

Gwaine's nose twitched, he viciously stabbed the muddy ground with a stick he'd found. "Somehow my one night stand with Merlin go into the conversation, made it a bit awkward. So, we weren't really talking about anything of importance. You haven't missed anything." 

Merlin's face froze, numerous unnameable emotions dances across it before it landed on guilty.  
Arthur's hand reflexively went to grip his sword, Gwaine's disregard for Merlin's honour was ignoble. Jealousy was running riot in Arthur, the thought of Gwaine's lips on Merlin's, of their bodies entwined, it infuriated him. 

Seeing Gwaine's miserable expression, Arthur's own softened and his hand unclenched. He understood what it felt like to want Merlin and not have him. It's what had prevented him from doing anything for so long. 

Arthur remembered admitting his feelings to Merlin. It had been a painfully awkward affair, stilted conversation that was only smoothed when Merlin's mouth met his. Emotions unravelling as hands grabbed hair and kisses dissolved doubt. 

Arthur squared his shoulders, he realised now what Gwaine meant by his odd comments. Arthur had just assumed Gwaine was being his usual strange self but now he had context and understood the intent behind the words. 

He slumped, he couldn't blame Gwaine for being bitter. He couldn't imagine how he would react to getting so close to Merlin and losing him. He also couldn't bear to see the look on Merlin's face whenever he saw Gwaine. Arthur needed to find a way to resolve this or they'd all end up miserable. 

And so, Arthur suggested a celebration at the tavern. When asked what for he said "For being alive." To which there was much jeering and many cheeky comments. Merlin smiled, Arthur had told the knights of their new status as a couple but tried to keep public affection to a minimum. They held hands secretly under the table as they all ordered drinks. 

Lancelot and Gwaine were sat together, crowded around a table talking quietly. Gwaine was on his fourth- no fifth drink, everyone else was slow to catch up with Gwaine's pace.

"Its clear your nursing a broken heart but alcohol isn't the way to do it." He heard Lancelot tell Gwaine in a low voice. 

To which Gwaine responded "Find me a better way and I'll take it." 

What Gwaine didn't know is that Arthur had found a way, or well what he hoped would be a way. The new recruit Percy was introduced. 

He wasn't sure whether he and Gwaine would hit it off but Arthur had a good feeling. Later that tonight he saw them both chatting and laughing, sat close they toasted drinks and talked on for the rest of the night. Gwaine had been pulled out of his melancholic mood and his eyes twinkled as he looked at Percy. 

When Merlin left, he did so with his happy disposition back in place and his arm slung around Arthur rather than his mopey, pitiful temperament. 

Arthur even smuggled a kiss on their way back up to his chambers, slipping it past Merlin who usually scolded him if they so much as touched hands outside of his room. 

Now that Gwaine was happy, Merlin was happy and that made Arthur happy. So it was a win-win situation. Arthur didn't think Gwaine had even realised that Merlin had left. If he did, he no longer cared, he was too focused on Percy. 

Merlin and Arthur celebrated long into the night, although they commemorated in a way that didn't involve alcohol. 

The dopey smile on Gwaine's face in training the next day, and his new fascination with the new tall knight led to a perfectly happy practice. 

Right up until Merlin managed to drop a bunch of shields and the sword tucked under his arm on his way over to the knights. 

"Merlin!"


End file.
